Your Guide to a Stress-Free Valentine's Day

When you’re dating someone, Valentine’s Day can be a blast. It’s an opportunity to share time and gush about each other in a way that’s inappropriate any other time of year. Plus, you usually get to glut on chocolate and that’s a win for everyone involved. Then again, V-Day has the potential to be super stressful.

If you’re trying to make the day extra special, I offer a guide to making your Valentine’s Day both enjoyable and as stress-free as possible.

1. If the goal is to make Feb. 14 as stress-free as possible, let’s just get one thing straight, you gotta remember that it’s Valentine’s Day. In the hustle and chaos of our busy 21st-century lives, it’s easy to forget what’s going on each day of the week. From those relentless Facebook invites to the plans we’ll make after too many glasses of wine, it becomes increasingly difficult to keep everything straight. However, Valentine’s Day, much like your partner’s birthday, cannot fall victim to your modern-day forgetfulness.

One of the great things about our modernity is that it’s so easy to make sure you remember everything. If you’ve got a smartphone, the calendar booking experience can be enjoyable. With apps such as Teux Deux, your calendar can actually be inviting. But, if you’re still in the ’90s game with a not-so-smart phone, write yourself a billion notes, wear 30 ribbons on you fingers, write reminders on your mirror, just make sure you don’t miss it, because, all too quickly, things will get stressful.

2. When we imagine doing things on Valentine’s Day our thoughts are immediately filled with epic scenes of romantic comedy over-the-topness: as if you have to ride an elephant to dinner on top of the Empire State Building and get Sting to serenade you and your lady, all while dining on lobster and crème of something rare.

The truth is that the whole over-the-top thing is played out. What’s the alternative, you ask? How about a little intimacy? How about something specific to you and your partner? No more excuses about being too tired to give her that massage. Never mind getting that silk suit you love from that Rick Ross video; Valentine’s Day should be about your partner, not a fashion statement. Try picking up the kids from school or doing all the laundry as a gesture of your love for her.

Going over-the-top works well in the movies, but out here in the real world its far better to go with something meaningful than something that begins your slide into bankruptcy.

3. There’s no need spend a fortune having a great time on Valentine’s Day. We’ll discuss gifts in a minute, but first, let’s cover the "date" part of this most glorious of holidays.

You may be thinking of heading out to a nice restaurant and ordering the most expensive wine on the list, but I’ve got a better idea: How about some homemade cocktails, and ordering from Quickness? For less than you’d spend on dinner alone, you could Google your favorite cocktail ingredients, have a great time making drinks, then have a dude on a bicycle bring you a delicious dinner. You could support a local business, have a relaxing time sipping your favorite drink and watching a cute movie.

If ordering out isn’t your thing, show her you really care, and actually cook something. Throw back a few of those cocktails and have a good time making dinner. Don’t worry if everything isn’t perfect, that’s what makes it enjoyable, stress-free and fun. The more relaxed you make the evening, the more time you have to lock loving gazes and make fun of each other.

4. Now, for those of you who are fairly new to your relationship, Valentine’s Day is not the occasion to take things to the next level. It may sound romantic to step things up on this day of fluttering hearts, but this too, is a bit over-the-top.

Imagine you make the plan to drop the "love" bomb. Surely, you’re imagining the hum of smooth jazz, a belly full of great food, and his face wreathed in candlelight. You lean in and offer your sweet little heart on a platter. You also imagine him responding in kind. Yet, what if he doesn’t? Maybe you just want to move things in a more serious direction, maybe it’s not an admission of love you want to express, perhaps just some offer of commitment. Again, what if she’s not on the same page? Imagine now, that your every Valentine’s Day to follow will be marred by your 2012 slip-up. It’s a gamble, no?

While it’s certainly a romantic night, its best to fill your mouth with Virginia wine, and save the risky confessions for when the pressure is off and the occasion is less momentous. Keep things light, feel the love, then take another sip, and keep your mouth shut.

5. By way of convention, we believe that getting a gift for our partner on Valentine’s Day is a great idea. However, what to get? How much to spend? Well, my friend, the answers are something endearing, and not that much.

While it would be best to chat about expectations of what your Valentine’s Day will look like, it’s a safe bet to go cute before gaudy. Go pick up something useful at Taboo or perhaps just make him a pie and call it done. It’s best not to have that whole competitive gift-buying thing and better to, again, keep it simple.

Regardless of whether you’re a fan of the day or not, Feb.14 is an opportunity to get gushy with someone you’re into. If you try hard to make it more than that, you’re probably over thinking it and finding yourself a bit stressed. Take the load off yourself and your partner, and just enjoy each other’s company. The beast with two backs, look it up.

Enjoy the holiday.